I
have gone a fair amount of heat the over the last several months about much I
dwell on Bill Maher, his unfunny comedy, how he’s always had conservative
values despite claiming he was progressive, how he is a misogynist, how he
has more conservative guests than he does liberals, etc. There’s more I could
have said about him as time has gone by – I had a piece comparing him to H.L.
Mencken that wasn’t flattering to either of it – but I took the hint of my readers,
and I ignored him.
But
sometimes when a guy throws you a fat pitch, you just have to swing it. And
that is what happened when Chris Cuomo (who you’d think would know better by
now) interviewed Bill Maher on his new show a few days ago.
In
his typical smarmy fashion Cuomo said Maher “crushes Trevor Noah and John
Oliver in the ratings.” Well, Noah’s on every day and Maher’s once a week so
that’s not a fair comparison Chris, but why kick a guy when he’s down. “But Noah
and Oliver always win the Emmys.” (Noah has never won an Emmy; you’re thinking
of Jon Stewart, a man who Maher has only mocked, but fine keep digging your own
grave.) “Why do you think that is?”
Maher
in his humble fashion says: “I tell the truth to my audience. The Emmys are too
woke.”
Wow,
Bill. I mean seriously. That’s the first thing I think of when I think of the
Emmys. An organization that only gave its first Best Actress in a Drama series
six years ago and has only recently enjoyed its second Best Supporting Actress
in a Comedy award in its history. An organization that has never given an Emmy
to an Asian American and barely has a track record with Latinos. An organization
that earned the hashtag #EmmysSoWhite last year. An organization, for
the record that has never nominated a female run show in the same category you
have gotten nominated in seventeen consecutive years. Tell Samantha Bee,
Chelsea Handler and Desus and Mero just how woke the Emmys are with a straight
face.
I
know that Hollywood is woke. They’ve told us in every awards show how woke they
are even though the people who vote in them look a lot more like you then the
people they want to reach out to. I know you never look at a movie except to
complain how big budget or depressing they are, but award shows for Film and
Television have a really bad track record when it comes to nominating
minorities. I realize you don’t pay attention to the Golden Globes because they
wouldn’t nominate you for anything, so I guess you missed the fact that they
weren’t aired on NBC this year because of the racial makeup of their
membership. Seriously when I think about an organization
with a long history of recognizing minorities, particularly series created and
run by women, African Americans, LGBTQ+ or anybody who doesn’t like you, my
thoughts immediately go to the Emmys. And when I think of diversity of choices,
my first thought goes to an organization Julia-Louis Dreyfus six consecutive
Emmys. She was on your network, Bill, you should remember that! I may care about
who they nominate far more than you do, but I am not blind to their flaw.
But
you’re a little right about why you’ve never won an Emmy. It’s not because you
tell the truth, though, everyone else in the category does this, with subtlety
and in ways you never have. It’s not because the Emmys have the repetitive
habit of recognizing the same shows over and over again, and you had the misfortune
of competing against Jon Stewart for a decade. (Though again, he was funnier
than you, not to mention humbler, nicer and actually being an advocate for
things.) And yes, you have you used racial slurs on your show which you won’t
apologize for, have had said bad things about being vaccinated, and argue that
anybody who complains who doesn’t like you is ‘whining’. But that’s still not
the reason you haven’t won. No, you have never won an Emmy and never will for
reasons that have to do with how the Emmys have always given awards and who
they give awards to.
Now,
maybe you are legitimately not the kind of person who wants to kiss ass or do
anything to advocate for your own series. Hell, maybe you think that your shows
should win only on its own merits (though I’ve watched you long enough to know
you’re not that naïve.) But honestly, I don’t think that’s why you do it. I
think if you actually won an Emmy, you wouldn’t be able to swallow your pride
for thirty seconds speech and be humble. I think you’ve spent so much time in
your own bubble, only hearing your audience laugh at your stale jokes, doing
the same schtick for thirty years that you can’t accept – or legitimately
understand – what makes your material inferior to Stephen Colbert’s or John Oliver’s
– people who have had to work their way up the ladder to get where they are where
as you, as I have explained, are a legacy comedian. And for the record, you work
for HBO. You know as well as anyone that once you get nominated for an Emmy in
a certain category, you stay there forever. There has to be a radical improvement in
talent – or your show has to really drop in quality – for the
nominations to stop coming. ER was on the air for fifteen years, but after
eight they stopped nominating it for Best Drama. Law and Order was on
the air for twenty years. They stopped nominating it after eleven. You’ve been
on the air for nineteen years. Take the hint.
So
no, the Emmys are not nominating you anymore because you are too much of a
truth-teller. They are not nominating you because they think other Late-Night Comedy
Series are better. That they nominated you for so long over Seth Meyers and Samantha
Bee is actually a far greater travesty but as we know very well, you’re only in
this for you. So go ahead, sulk in your
tent like Amy Poehler and Jimmy Kimmel. Oh wait, they don’t sulk when its time
for awards shows. They host them. Something that you would never demean
yourself to do even if it might help you win an Emmy.
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